Someone says, “Can we talk about something?”
Before they’ve even finished the sentence, your stomach drops. You’re already apologising, defending yourself, or preparing for the relationship to end.
If conflict was used to shame, silence, or control you growing up, your nervous system may never have learned the difference between disagreement and danger. In this episode, Helen explores why healthy conflict can feel so threatening, why many people either avoid difficult conversations or assume every disagreement is catastrophic, and how ADHD, autism, and childhood conditioning can make conflict even harder to navigate.
Resources mentioned:
Research on emotional regulation in ADHD
Research on operant conditioning and learning
Go deeper:
This week’s companion episode of Is This A Thing? explores why recovery after conflict can take so much longer for some people, what your nervous system is doing after the conversation has ended, and practical ways to shorten that recovery. Available on The Hub: liberationacademy.co.uk/the-hub
Aperio Profiles:
Neurodivergent-informed cognitive and personality profiling for individuals, managers, and HR. Not a diagnosis. A functional map of how your brain actually works.
aperioprofiles.co.uk
